It Ain’t About Us

As I said earlier this month, I started off the summer flat burned out. In fact, if I were completely honest about it, I’ve just come thru a time of emotional, physical and spiritual exhaustion like I’ve never been thru before. And the bad part is, it’s all been my fault. Several times I thought I was working my way thru it, but right when I got to the point of resolution, something happened to shut it all down. Fortunately, every time I was closing in on the light at the end of the tunnel, I discovered more and more things that were contributing to the state in which I was. The number one reason that kept coming back again and again was that I was trying to do the job of the Lord in my own power. One thing I know for sure from past experience is that every time my focus is shifted from Christ and His ability in and thru me, I will hit the wall very quickly. True ministry can only happen when the Holy Spirit is working in and thru our lives, using us as instruments of His purposes. When I lose sight of that and begin to mistakenly believe that ministry is up to my ability to do the work, I’m on a fast track to trouble. One thing that happens is that I think the ministry work is all about me… I make myself the center of the effort and the center of attention. When I do that, I start taking everything personally. Every critical remark, every snide comment, every sideways glance, can set me off in a second. And since I’m one of those people who have a tendency to wear my feelings on my sleeve, it doesn’t take long until I’m influencing others wrongly, depressed, and I want to quit. I struggle with sharp critics when things are going well, much less when they’re going badly. So this time in the pit has taught me how important it is to make sure I’m doing what God has called me to do, where He’s called me to be. If I’m uncertain of that, it’s easy for me to question everything. Rick Warren said that during his time as pastor of Saddleback, he’s had numerous critics. One thing he has discovered, however, is that usually the critics spew their caustic remarks then they leave. “On the other hand, if the critics stay, the pastor most likely goes. You’ve got to decide, who is going to stay – you or the critics…”

If we keep the proper perspective about ministry, and remember that it’s not about us, then we’ll also know that the criticism isn’t about us either… In my particular case of burnout, I didn’t slip into the abyss because of critics, but they are always around. So, I have had to check my motivation… I’ve had to ask myself the hard questions like: “Do I minister because I like to be needed? Do I do what I do for recognition or applause? What is my reason for continuing to remain in ministry?” If I do what I do for approval, recognition, or applause, the question isn’t whether or not I’ll burn out & quit but when will it happen. I know one thing for certain – If I’m looking for approval, there are at least a million other easier ways to do it than as a pastor. But regardless of what we do, our motivation ahs to be that we do what we do for the glory of God. I must always evaluate my motives and make sure my efforts are solely for an audience of one. And in reality, my part is not so much about the ministry I perform, as it is in my surrendering myself totally to be used by God as He ministers in and thru me. When I have that focus and perspective, the criticism isn’t quite as apt to make me want to quit. What about you?

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