As we’ve been working our way thru this series – “40 Days of Love” – we’ve been discovering various ways for loving like Jesus loves us. One thing that makes us hesitant about building bridges of love into the lives of others is fear. Fear is not consistent with love. The Bible tells us that “perfect love casts out all fear.” So how can we get beyond the human tendency to be afraid? The solution is the Holy Spirit. 2 Timothy 1:7 in the Living Bible translation says, "For the Holy Spirit, God's gift, does not want you to be afraid of people, but to be wise and strong, and to love them and enjoy being with them."
The first principle for building bridges of love is to: Be courageous and take the initiative!
Don't wait for the other person to come to you. Take the initiative to connect with them. This will take courage because our natural tendency is to be full of fear and anxiety. We're afraid of being rejected, manipulated, hurt, or used.
Fear is as old as mankind. When Adam and Eve sinned and God came looking for Adam, Adam said, "I was afraid ... and I hid" (Genesis 3:10). We hide our true selves. We don't want people to know what we're really like. We think, "If I tell you who I am and you don't like me, I have no alternative." So we wear masks and we pretend so we can present ourselves in a way that we think is presentable. But fear is a problem when it comes to loving relationships.
Our fears make us defensive. We're afraid to reveal ourselves. When people point out weaknesses we retaliate and defend ourselves.
Our fears keep us distant. We don't let people get close to us. We want to withdraw and hide our emotions. We don't want to be open and honest.
Our fears make us demanding. The more insecure we are the more we try to control or dominate things. We try to have the last word. That's a symptom of fear and insecurity.
You get courage to counter the fear from God's Spirit in your life. I believe one of the evidences of being filled with the Spirit is that you’ll be more courageous in your relationships. You’ll love people. You’ll enjoy being with them. You won’t be afraid of them because God's Spirit is in your life. The Bible says "God is love" (1 John 4:16 NLT) and "Love casts out all fear" (1 John 4:18 NASB). The more of God you have in your life the less fear you'll have. So the starting point in building a bridge of love to anybody is to pause and pray and say, "God, give me the courage to take the first step."
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